


Promenade

by azee



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, SixTONES (Band)
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Lost Love, M/M, Missed Chance, im really bad at this, it really hurts char, send halp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:49:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28871850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azee/pseuds/azee
Summary: In a million alternate universes, he just hopes that in a different world, they are together, with no hindrances, no what ifs, no fears. Just plain love.
Relationships: Kyomoto Taiga/Matsumura Hokuto
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	Promenade

The cool wind of September, marking the start of Fall season, brushed against Hokuto’s cheeks as he stepped out of the hotel. Their high school reunion was held today. It has been so long since he went back to his hometown. 

He initially planned not to attend the reunion for various reasons. But it was really hard to say ‘no’ when you have persistent friends who do not know when to stop. 

After a hellish week to finish all of his work at once, he went back to his hometown for a few days of vacation. 

“Hokuto, wait up!” He looked up and saw Jesse and Yugo walking up to him, almost running. A smile broke on his face when he saw them hand in hand. 

“Let’s all walk together!” Jesse excitedly told him, a little louder he had to cover his ears. 

“Jeez, you never change.” He commented. 

“He never did.” Yugo agreed and looked back at the direction of the hotel lobby. “Let’s just wait for Taiga.” 

He bit his lower lip and looked away when he saw the lad walking out of the hotel, one ear on the phone. 

“Hey, is it okay?” He heard Jesse ask in a low voice. 

Before he could answer, Taiga went up to them, putting his phone in the pocket of his parka. “Hey! Sorry, I had to make a call.”

They then started to walk their way to the bus station. 

“It’s fine, it’s fine.” Yugo said. “You guys have plans for tonight?”

All of them exchanged glances. When he met with Taiga’s eyes, he immediately looked away. He wanted to smack himself for doing it but he maintained his composure.

“Well, I actually have a online meeting for work tomorrow.” He saw Taiga looking at his wrist watch. The ring on Taiga’s left hand was not able to escape his gaze. “I actually have to be home soon, I’m sorry.” 

“Oh, bummer.” Jesse pouted. “I actually have to report to work tomorrow morning, too. How about you, Hokuto?”

“I’m free tonight.” He answered. 

Yugo paused for a bit, seemed to be thinking of something. “Well, how does dinner tomorrow night sound?”

“I’d love to.” Taiga’s eyes sparkled. Just like when he found something he likes, or when he’s excited. 

“You okay with that?” Yugo asked him, which he just shrugged his shoulders at as an answer. “Alright, that’s fixed then. I’ll just text you guys the details.”

For a brief moment, they all walked in silence. All he can hear were occasional passing cars and the waves hitting the sand. This promenade is actually close to his heart. He can see their high school selves fooling around, walking side by side, faces filled with sheepish smiles. 

“Remember this bench?” He looked at Jesse who sat on a wooden bench. 

“Was that the bench you wrote ours name on?” Taiga asked, walking closer to Jesse. 

They all walked up to him and with the help on a flashlight from Jesse’s phone, they saw their names engraved. 

“What the heck were thinking, babe?” Yugo asked him, smacking his boyfriend’s head.

“If I remember correctly, we stayed late at school that night because Jesse forgot his notebook at his desk.” Taiga said, occupying the empty seat beside Jesse. 

“I don’t even remember much details actually.” Jesse roared with laughter. “All I remember was we were eating ice cream here and then the next morning, we were called at the President’s office because of the wooden door I broke.”

Remembering that one event from their high school, all of them broke into laughter, sharing their own experiences on that said day. Hokuto kinda felt nice, thinking it was a good decision that he went back home for the reunion. 

They continued on their way and shared more stories from their high school. Not long after, they reached the bus station. Jesse and Yugo had to bid their goodbyes. 

“Where are you to?” Hokuto managed to ask Taiga after an awkward minute of silence. 

Taiga’s face lit up when he finally spoke to him. “I actually have to go to Shin’s bar.”

His eyebrows furrowed. “I thought you have to go home now?”

“I’ll be waiting for my ride there.” Taiga answered. 

He nodded and paused for a while. “Want to walk together? Same direction to my house anyway.” 

They started to go down the road, towards their friend’s bar. No one tried to start a conversation. Hokuto was dreading to say something, anything. But he’s afraid that he might drive him away. Not now that he’s feeling this familiar, comfortable warmth with his  _ best friend.  _

He tried to steal a glance at the lad walking beside him. Taiga was looking straight ahead, lips tightly locked. Taiga was in deep thought, troubled. He might have been looking at him for too long because Taiga looked at him. His best friend has a surprised looked on his face. 

“Why?” Taiga asked, tilting his head to the side. 

He scratched his forehead. “You looked troubled.” 

Taiga was taken aback but smiled after. “You still can tell, huh.”

_ Of course. I can tell when you’re troubled, when you’re faking your smiles, when you’re tired. I still know… I still do.  _

But all those words just stayed inside him. 

“So, care to tell what’s bothering you?” He finally spoke. 

Taiga’s hands were closed to his chest, his fingers fidgeting. “Are you mad at me, Hokkun?”

His heart pounded in his chest hearing those words from Taiga. Every word made him tremble. But he wanted to indulge himself on hearing Taiga call him  _ Hokkun  _ again. It felt like nothing has changed over the past decade. As if all of his pain, every heartbreak were just part of an ugly dream and now he woke up, with Taiga beside him. Once again. 

Just the two of them. 

“Are you?” He heard Taiga asked once again, his eyes were looking at the ground. 

He took a deep breath to compose himself. “I am not. What made you think about that?” 

“Are you sure?” Taiga went in front of him, stopping him from his tracks. Taiga was directly under a streetlight, showering him white light. 

“Y-Yeah.” He said. He can feel his cheeks getting warm, he had to look away. 

He heard Taiga sighed in relief and turned his back at him. His best friend started walking again so he followed and matched his pace. 

“How are you doing?” He asked Taiga. 

Taiga showed him his big smile. “I’m doing great. Aside from all the stuff I have to do, I’m doing good! How about you? How’s Tokyo?” 

“I’m good, too. So is Tokyo.” He replied.

“Oh, come on!” Taiga groaned. “That’s it? No stories you can share?”

He chuckled seeing Taiga’s frustrated face. “There’s nothing to tell. I always go straight home after work.”

“What? Don’t you go drinking with your colleagues?” Taiga asked, clearly in disbelief. “Or date?”

“I don’t date.” He immediately answered.

Taiga looked up at him. He just realized that they are now closer than earlier. The distance they have been comfortable at since they were still teenagers. 

“You don’t? I doubt it! I’m pretty sure a lot of people would wanna date you.” 

_ But I don’t want them. _

“That is not true.” He said, shaking his head. 

“Still not over with your last relationship?” Taiga’s voice was soft. He almost did not hear it clearly. “I mean, you two ended things so suddenly.”

He almost forgot that Taiga knew his last relationship with. Shiori and he ended their relationship almost two years ago. 

_ “You’re leaving?” He heard Shiori ask while he was busy packing some of his stuff in his duffle bag for an overnight trip. He was moving fast, not wanting to waste any second. _

_ “Yeah, I’m sorry.” He said absentmindedly, his focus was on the stuff he has to bring.  _

_ Shiori did not respond. As he finished packing, he looked back at his girlfriend who was sitting on the chair by his table. Shiori was biting her lower lip, her hands were gripping the apron she was wearing.  _

_ “Shiori?” He called her name as he zipped his duffle bag.  _

_ “Stay.” Her girlfriend almost whispered.  _

_ “But--” _

_ “Stay, Hokuto. Stay here with me.” It sounded more of a command than a request. But Shiori’s eyes were pleading.  _

_ Hokuto kneeled in front of his sobbing girlfriend. He covered her hands with his. “It’s important that I go back home, Shiori.”  _

_ “Then, it’s important to me, too, that you stay here with me.” Shiori begged, looking directly at him with watery eyes. “Stay.” _

_ His hands fell on his sides, he had to look away. Hokuto’s heart cannot bear to see Shiori cry because of his selfishness.  _

_ Hokuto knew deep inside of him what he had to do. It was so simple. He has to stay with his girlfriend and he should not be making his girlfriend cry out for his attention. Shiori should not be begging for him to stay for the night.  _

_ But he could not make himself do it. Right at that very moment, Hokuto was aware that he was the biggest jerk in Tokyo. He did not want Shiori to get mad at him. Just as much as he did not want to get mad at himself for not doing this… for not going back to his hometown for Taiga, for his best friend.  _

_ Hokuto’s heart and mind was still fighting over what he had to do, his mind was about to lose big time.  _

_ Shiori went down and kneeled in front of him. His girlfriend was now smiling at him with sad eyes.  _

_ “Shio--” _

_ Shiori cut him off by hugging him. It was not as tight as Shiori used to hug him every time, yet it felt so heavy for him. His hands wrapped around her instinctively.  _

_ Shiori’s words pierced through his heart, like thousands of arrows were launched at him. Yet it felt like something huge was lifted off of him.  _

_ “I hope both of you find happiness with each other.”  _

_ She gave him a kiss on his cheeks, he even felt her tears brushed off against him. His hand tried to reach out to her as she walked away, leaving the apron on his dining chair. His eyes wandered on his dining table where food was prepared by Shiori for their anniversary.  _

As they continued walking, Hokuto could see his past self, running from the bus station with a duffel bag slung on his shoulder. 

“If I may ask, why did the two of you decide to call it off?” Taiga called his attention, he was looking up at him. His cheeks were red due to the cold breeze. He had to fight himself to refrain himself from touching his cheeks. “I mean, you were already in your second, third year but why?”

Hokuto put both of his hands inside the pockets of his jacket as the cold wind blew again. He inhaled deeply, not wanting to dwell on that fateful day that almost broke him. 

The words in his mouth were fighting to go out and be heard. But he knew that it was already too late. Years have already passed, great changes have already happened. 

“It was because we wanted different things.” He recalled. 

Taiga fell silent, it was as if he was digesting every word he said. “That’s too bad.” He finally said.

They have reached a small entryway from the promenade going down to the beach. Taiga saw it and got excited. 

“Let’s go!” Taiga pulled him by the wrist and they both ran. 

_ Three hours later, Hokuto arrived in Shizuoka. He wasted no minute and immediately ran towards the park Taiga said he was at. Unfortunately, there was no Taiga on sight. It has been three hours anyway.  _

_ He went to the beach area, went over to Taiga’s University, and even called his house. Taiga was nowhere to be found until Shintaro sent him a text message.  _

I thought you’re going to meet up with Taiga tonight? 

Taiga’s here with someone. 

-Shin

_ His breathing accelerated, his body went cold. He felt fear, it was blinding.  _

_ Hokuto has never known fear since childhood. He was not afraid of ghosts after reading or watching horror stories, he was not afraid of bugs, darkness, or even storms. He was not afraid to do anything extraordinary because he always thinks things through. He was not afraid to take a leap because he knows Taiga will always be with him, will always be watching him and that was more than enough. _

_ With a shaking body, he managed to start pulling himself towards Shintaro’s bar. His footsteps felt heavy as he neared the place.  _

_ From the window, he saw Taiga. His best friend’s eyes were red, most probably from crying, but he was...laughing. His laughing face was different. It was as if this time, Taiga was genuinely happy. For the first time in so long.  _

“How were you after the break up?” he heard Taiga asked. Both of them were now walking barefoot on the sand. “I know it’s already too late to ask, but since you basically cut off everyone, I don’t know what happened to you.” There was a hint of resentment on his tone. 

“Nothing much.” He said. “I just wanted time for myself, so I drowned myself with work.”

“Typical Hokuto.” Taiga commented. 

They left the beach area and started to walk along the Promenade. From a distance, he can see the signage for Shintaro’s bar. 

_ If only I can pause time,  _ he thought. 

They walk in a comfortable silence, at least for Taiga. All of his suppressed emotions wanted to jump out of him. He wanted to tell him everything…

To tell him that, after all these years, it is still Taiga. 

He still owns his heart. He still cares for him even if he hurts other people, people who love him. He still wants Taiga to have all the best in this life because Taiga deserves it. Taiga is still his first choice, his number one. 

He knew it was too late. But he’s stubborn enough not to quit, because for him, his love for Taiga is worth fighting for. Even if he already lost the fight years ago. 

“The wooden bench.” Taiga suddenly spoke, bringing him away from his thoughts. “Do you still remember?”

He looked at him, puzzled. “What do you mean?”

Taiga was playing with his own thumbs, avoiding his gaze. “The wooden bench was a mark of a friendship among the four of us.” Taiga started to speak. 

“Yeah.” He agreed. 

“But for me…” Taiga continued, stopping from his tracks. “It was the same spot where you told me once that you were in love with me.” 

Hokuto’s heart was thumping like crazy, his body was frozen on the spot. He remembers that day so well. Thinking about it now, it felt bittersweet. He can feel his eyes watering up so he decided to look up. He saw the sky covered with stars.  _ Beautiful _ , he thought,  _ but already dead. _

“Can I be honest with you?” Taiga asked him, but before he could answer, Taiga continued. “That day, it was the happiest moment of my life.” 

He immediately turned his head towards him. 

“I--” Taiga choked on his words. “I was actually in love with you before.”

“W-What?” 

Taiga turned to him with a shy smile. “Yes. But I was afraid to let you go.”

“W-Wha--”

“I was afraid that if we became a couple, we eventually would break up and I would lose you.” Taiga said, he has this sad smile on his face. “And you are the only person in my life that I don’t want to lose.”

“T-Taiga…” His voice broke.

As he was about to reach Taiga’s face, the latter spoke again, only to break all of the million possibilities that they could have had. 

“I know that I shouldn’t have been afraid of losing you.” Taiga mumbled. “Because it was you were talking about. It was you. The only person who will come through for me, no matter where you are, no matter what you’re doing. I know that I…” Taiga’s voice broke, tears started to come out of his eyes. “...I know that you will not leave me. No matter what.” 

His mind wanted to wrap his arms around Taiga, cover him from the world, from anyone. But he was frozen. Hokuto did not know that his heart could be broken anymore. 

“Hokkun…” Taiga reached for his shaking hands. “I’m really sorry if I hurt you before. I’m really sorry that I let my fear get the best of me. I’m sorry if at some point, I drove you away from me. But right now, I-I just want you back.” 

He managed to weakly grip Taiga’s hands. 

“I just want my best friend back.” Taiga mumbled. “Just like the old times.”

Hokuto did not know how he managed to walk to Shintaro’s bar, with Taiga beside him. He did not know how to process all of the things Taiga had said to him. The ray of hope he had when he heard Taiga was in love with him, too, and that they can be together was gone too soon. 

In a million alternate universes, he just hopes that in a different world, they are together, with no hindrances, no what ifs, no fears. Just plain love. 

“Shin, have you seen Hokkun?” he heard Taiga said across the bar counter. He was sitting on the floor, with a heavy heart. He felt Shin, who was standing beside him, glanced at him as he picked up a glass. 

“I think he went out for a phone call.” Shin said. “I’ll just tell him that you already left.”

“Too bad, I wanted to say goodbye.” He can hear the disappointment in Taiga’s voice. “Give this to him, okay? Bye, Shin!” 

Just like years ago, he felt weak, useless and doesn’t have any purpose anymore. 

_ What now? _

“Here.” Shin handed him an envelope. He sat down beside him. “You know, you don’t have to.”

Hokuto opened the envelope and saw what it was. 

**_You are cordially invited to share a celebration of love in a wedding between Juri and Taiga._ **

  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I can write stories that can make me sad when I'm stressed T_T 
> 
> Thank you for reaching here! Cheers!


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